10 phrases people with excellent emotional intelligence use to make others feel special

If you’ve ever met someone who instantly puts you at ease, chances are they have high emotional intelligence. They notice small things, they listen deeply, and they know how to use language in ways that make people feel valued.

Emotional intelligence (EQ) isn’t just about controlling your own emotions—it’s also about recognizing the feelings of others and responding in a way that makes them feel seen, respected, and appreciated.

Words are central to this. A single phrase, spoken sincerely, can change how someone experiences a moment. The right words can soften tension, deepen bonds, and even help others believe more in themselves.

So let’s explore 10 powerful phrases that people with excellent emotional intelligence often use to make others feel truly special.

1. “I really appreciate you for…”

Gratitude is powerful, but specific gratitude is transformative. Instead of just saying thank you, emotionally intelligent people take it a step further.

• “I really appreciate you for staying late to finish this project.”

• “I really appreciate you for listening without judgment.”

This kind of acknowledgement makes someone feel their effort didn’t just go unnoticed—it mattered. It gives weight to their contribution, strengthening trust and connection.

2. “Tell me more—I want to understand.”

We all crave to be heard, but more than that, we crave to be understood. Emotional intelligence shows up in the willingness to listen without rushing to fix or judge.

By saying “Tell me more”, you signal: Your experience matters. I’m here for it.

It turns an ordinary conversation into a safe space where someone can share freely. And when people feel understood, they also feel cared for.

3. “I can see why you’d feel that way.”

Validation doesn’t mean agreement. It simply acknowledges that someone’s emotions are real and reasonable from their perspective.

This phrase communicates empathy: I get it. Your feelings are valid.

It defuses defensiveness, builds trust, and shows that you’re tuned in to the emotional layer of the interaction—not just the surface facts.

4. “You have a real talent for…”

People often doubt their own strengths. That’s why recognition from others can be so meaningful.

Emotional intelligence is about spotting what others are good at and highlighting it. Saying “You have a real talent for making people feel comfortable” or “You have a real talent for seeing solutions others miss” gives someone confidence and reinforces their identity in a positive way.

This is also where I like to remind readers about my book, Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How to Live with Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego. In it, I explore how mindful awareness and compassion can bring out the best in ourselves—and in others.

5. “That must have been really tough for you.”

Sometimes people don’t need advice—they just need their struggle to be acknowledged.

This phrase recognizes the weight of what someone has gone through. Instead of brushing past difficulty with “You’ll be fine”, you pause and say: “That must have been really tough.”

It makes people feel less alone. And often, that’s what gives them strength to keep going.

6. “I’d love to hear your perspective.”

Inviting input is one of the clearest ways to make someone feel valued.

When you say “I’d love to hear your perspective”, you’re not only respecting their opinion—you’re signaling that their voice matters.

This creates a culture of mutual respect, whether in friendships, families, or workplaces. And it can also lead to better decisions, since people bring unique insights when they feel safe to share.

7. “You make a real difference when…”

Similar to appreciation, this phrase shines a light on impact. It tells someone: What you do changes things for the better.

Examples:

• “You make a real difference when you bring your calm energy into stressful situations.”

• “You make a real difference when you ask thoughtful questions in meetings.”

It affirms not just their actions, but their effect on the world. That’s a deeply empowering gift.

8. “I noticed how hard you worked on this.”

Sometimes people toil away, unnoticed. Emotional intelligence means paying attention—not just to results, but to effort.

By saying “I noticed how hard you worked on this”, you validate dedication. It reassures people that their unseen hours and persistence don’t go ignored.

This recognition can be more motivating than any material reward, because it touches the heart.

9. “I’m really glad we spent this time together.”

People remember how you make them feel. By expressing joy in their presence, you make the other person feel valued simply for being themselves.

This phrase works with friends, colleagues, or even casual acquaintances. It transforms an ordinary interaction into a moment that lingers: I matter enough that my presence brought you happiness.

10. “You’ve taught me something important.”

One of the greatest compliments is to be seen as a source of wisdom.

When you say “You’ve taught me something important”, you shift the balance of power. Instead of just being the one who gives, you acknowledge that the other person has enriched you.

It shows humility, respect, and openness—the hallmarks of genuine emotional intelligence.

Conclusion

Emotional intelligence isn’t about clever tricks—it’s about authenticity. These phrases only work if they come from a place of sincerity.

The common thread is simple: they all communicate You matter. They show appreciation, validation, and recognition—the core needs that every human being carries.

The good news? Anyone can practice this. With mindful awareness, you can choose words that uplift instead of diminish, connect instead of divide.

And the more you use them, the more you’ll notice a shift—not just in how others respond to you, but in how you feel about yourself.

If you’d like to dive deeper into cultivating this kind of presence, I explore it further in my book Hidden Secrets of Buddhism: How to Live with Maximum Impact and Minimum Ego. It’s about living with clarity, compassion, and strength—qualities that naturally make others feel special.

Because in the end, emotional intelligence isn’t just about relationships. It’s about creating a way of life where everyone feels seen, valued, and uplifted—yourself included.