7 hobbies couples do together that make their relationship last decades

My husband Matias and I have been together for years now, and one thing that keeps us connected through the chaos of work, parenting, and life across continents is the hobbies we share. When you're juggling a one-year-old, full-time jobs, and trying to keep your home running smoothly, it's easy to let your relationship run on autopilot.

But here's what I've noticed. The couples around us who've been together for decades don't just survive the routine. They build small rituals together that make the relationship feel alive. These aren't grand romantic gestures or expensive date nights every week. They're simple, recurring activities that give them something to look forward to and enjoy as a team.

I've also seen this in my own life. Our weekly date nights in São Paulo keep us grounded. The time we spend together in Santiago with family support lets us reconnect in a different way. And the hobbies we've built into our routine give us something that's ours, separate from being parents or professionals.

Here are seven hobbies that couples who stay together for decades seem to share, and why they work.

1. Cooking meals together from scratch

There's something grounding about standing side by side in the kitchen, chopping vegetables while one person stirs the pot. It's not just about the food. It's about the rhythm you create together and the conversations that happen when your hands are busy.

Matias and I cook fresh meals daily. We've turned it into a routine where one of us preps ingredients while the other cleans up as we go. It's efficient, yes, but it's also when we catch up on the small things that happen during the day. Those moments feel more natural than sitting down and forcing a conversation after a long day.

I've noticed that couples who cook together tend to be more patient with each other. You learn how the other person works, what they need, and how to move around each other without stepping on toes. That skill translates to other parts of life. As noted by Dr. John Gottman, a researcher known for studying what makes relationships last, couples who build small, positive moments together create a foundation that helps them weather bigger challenges.

Cooking together also saves money, keeps you healthier, and gives you something tangible to enjoy at the end. You sit down, eat what you made, and feel a sense of accomplishment. That shared pride matters.

2. Taking evening walks after dinner

Walking might sound too simple to count as a hobby, but it's one of the most consistent ways couples stay connected. Every morning, I walk Matias to work with our daughter in the stroller. It's our time to talk about the day ahead, make plans, or just enjoy each other's company before the workday starts.

Evening walks work the same way. After the baby goes to sleep and the kitchen is clean, some couples put on their shoes and head outside. There's no screen, no distractions, just movement and conversation. You notice things about your neighborhood. You talk about things you wouldn't bring up at the dinner table. Sometimes you don't talk at all, and that's fine too.

Walking together creates a habit of spending time without any agenda. You're not solving a problem or planning something. You're just together, and that regularity builds trust and comfort over time.

3. Learning a new language or skill side by side

When you learn something together, you're both beginners. That levels the playing field and creates a sense of partnership that's different from your everyday dynamic. You make mistakes together, laugh at yourselves, and celebrate small wins.

I've lived across Central Asia, Malaysia, and now Brazil. Learning Portuguese together with Matias when we first moved here was one of the best things we did for our relationship. We practiced at home, corrected each other gently, and used our new words when we went out. It gave us a shared goal and something to work toward as a team.

It doesn't have to be a language. It could be learning to play an instrument, taking a pottery class, or figuring out how to fix things around the house. The point is that you're growing together instead of in separate directions. That keeps the relationship dynamic instead of stagnant.

4. Playing board games or cards regularly

Games bring out a different side of people. You see how they handle competition, how they react when things don't go their way, and how they celebrate when they win. It's playful, but it also reveals character.

My husband and I have a handful of games we rotate through when we want to unwind after putting our daughter to bed. Sometimes we play something quick and light. Other times we pull out something more strategic. Either way, it's an hour where we're fully engaged with each other instead of scrolling or watching TV in silence.

Games also create memories. You remember the time someone pulled off an impossible move or the night everything went hilariously wrong. Those stories become part of your shared history, and they give you something to laugh about later.

I've noticed that couples who play games together tend to have more fun in general. They don't take themselves too seriously, and they know how to keep things light even when life gets heavy.

5. Working out or staying active together

Physical activity releases endorphins, and doing it together amplifies that effect. You're both in a better mood, you're supporting each other's health, and you're building a routine that benefits you individually and as a couple.

Some couples go to the gym together. Others prefer hiking, cycling, or even just doing yoga at home. The specific activity matters less than the consistency. When you make fitness a shared priority, you're also making time for each other.

There's also something to be said for seeing your partner work hard toward a goal. It builds respect and admiration. You're not just the person they come home to. You're the person who shows up, pushes through, and doesn't quit. That matters in a relationship.

Plus, staying active keeps you both healthier for longer, which means more years together. That's the real goal, right?

6. Exploring new places, even locally

You don't need to fly across the world to explore together. Sometimes the best adventures happen an hour from home. When you make a habit of discovering new places, you keep curiosity alive in your relationship. You're not stuck in the same routine, eating at the same restaurants, walking the same streets.

Matias and I do this whenever we can. In São Paulo, we'll try a new café or visit a neighborhood we've never been to. When we're in Santiago with family, we take day trips to places neither of us has seen. It doesn't have to be expensive or elaborate. It just has to be something different.

Exploration also gives you something to plan together. You research, discuss, and decide as a team. Then you experience it together and create a new memory. Those experiences add depth to your relationship and give you more to talk about than just work and household tasks.

According to research by psychologist Dr. Arthur Aron, couples who engage in novel and exciting activities together report higher relationship satisfaction. The novelty keeps the connection fresh, even after years together.

7. Building or creating something with their hands

There's something deeply satisfying about making something physical together. Whether it's woodworking, gardening, crafting, or renovating a room, the act of building requires collaboration, patience, and problem-solving.

I love crafting by hand just for the joy of it, and whenever Matias joins me on a project, the experience feels different. We're working toward a shared vision, and we have to communicate clearly to make it happen. You can't half-listen when you're measuring wood or deciding where to plant something. You have to be present.

These projects also give you something tangible to look back on. You see the bookshelf you built together or the garden you planted, and you remember the process. You remember the frustrations, the breakthroughs, and the moment you stepped back and said, "We did that."

Couples who create together tend to approach problems differently. They're more willing to collaborate and less likely to shut down when something gets difficult. That mindset helps in every part of the relationship.

Final thoughts

Relationships that last decades aren't built on grand gestures or constant excitement. They're built on the small, consistent habits that keep two people connected through everything life throws at them. Hobbies give you a reason to show up for each other outside of obligations. They remind you why you chose this person in the first place.

The best part is that these hobbies don't require a lot of money or time. They just require a willingness to do something together instead of side by side. That shift makes all the difference.

Find something you both enjoy, make it a regular part of your routine, and watch how it changes the way you relate to each other. The years will pass either way. You might as well spend them doing things that bring you closer.