After decades of chasing success, a chance encounter with a joyful elderly couple on a trail made me realize I'd been measuring life all wrong—and what I discovered about their daily habits changed everything.
I recently recieved a letter from a long-time reader in his 70s who shared his thoughts on a subject that affects us all, yet that very few of us seem to crack.
Happiness.
In this article, I'll write in the voice of the aforementioned reader. And perhaps his words will touch you as deeply as they did me...
I spent most of my life thinking happiness was something that happened to you. You know, like winning the lottery or being born into the right family. Then, at 70, my perspective shifted completely.
It happened during a trail run last spring. I'd been running the same trails for decades, but that morning I bumped into an elderly couple I'd seen hiking there for years. They must have been in their eighties, moving slowly but steadily, stopping to examine wildflowers and laughing about something. When we crossed paths, the woman smiled and said, "Another beautiful day to be alive, isn't it?"
Something about her genuine joy stopped me in my tracks. Here I was, physically fit, financially comfortable after years as a financial analyst, yet I realized these two strangers radiated more contentment than I'd felt in years. That encounter sent me on a mission to understand what truly happy people do differently.
After months of observation, reflection, and filling several journals with notes, I discovered that the happiest people I knew weren't just lucky. They were intentionally practicing specific habits every single day. And once I started implementing these myself, everything changed.
1. They protect their mornings like sacred territory
Have you ever noticed how the happiest people seem to have this calm energy about them, even during chaos?
Here's their secret: they own their mornings before the world owns them. When I was working as a financial analyst, I'd roll out of bed, grab coffee, and immediately check emails. My day started with other people's demands and urgencies. No wonder I felt scattered.
The shift happened when I started waking at 5:30 AM for my trail runs. Those quiet hours before sunrise became my sanctuary. The happiest people I know all have some version of this morning ritual. One friend meditates for twenty minutes. Another writes three pages in her journal. A neighbor tends to his garden.
What matters isn't the activity itself. What matters is that you're choosing how to start your day rather than letting circumstances choose for you. This single change transformed how I felt about everything that followed. When you begin with intention, you carry that energy forward.
Try it for a week. Set your alarm thirty minutes earlier and do something just for you. Watch how it changes your entire day.
2. They practice selective attention
During my years analyzing financial markets, I learned something fascinating about human behavior. People see what they're looking for. If you're tracking tech stocks, suddenly every conversation seems to connect to technology. If you're thinking about buying a blue car, you notice blue cars everywhere.
The happiest people apply this principle to life itself. They actively look for things to appreciate. And here's the kicker: they find them, every single day.
I started experimenting with this after that encounter on the trail. Each morning during my run, I'd deliberately notice five beautiful things. A hawk circling overhead. The way morning light filtered through pine trees. The sound of a creek after rain. At first, it felt forced. Within weeks, it became automatic.
This isn't toxic positivity or ignoring problems. Happy people face challenges like everyone else. But they've trained their brains to also notice the good stuff that most of us walk right past. They see the helpful stranger, the perfectly ripe avocado at the market, the text from an old friend.
Your brain is constantly filtering information. Why not program it to catch more of what makes life worth living?
3. They move their bodies with joy, not punishment
Remember when you were a kid and movement was just play? Somewhere along the way, we turned exercise into this grim obligation, something we "should" do to burn calories or prevent disease.
The happiest people I know have reconnected with joyful movement. They dance in their kitchens, take walking meetings, garden with enthusiasm. For me, trail running isn't about maintaining my weight or hitting certain metrics. It's about feeling the earth under my feet, watching seasons change, pushing my body in ways that make me feel alive.
I've noticed something interesting at farmers' markets where I volunteer. The vendors who've been doing this work for decades move constantly, but with ease and pleasure. They're lifting, carrying, arranging, all with this fluid grace. They're not "exercising," they're living actively.
Find movement that makes you smile. Maybe it's swimming, maybe it's dancing to 80s music while you clean, maybe it's chasing your dog around the yard. When movement becomes play again, you'll crave it instead of dread it.
4. They invest in relationships like their life depends on it
Because honestly? It does.
During my finance career, I watched colleagues accumulate impressive portfolios while their personal relationships withered. They'd skip dinner with friends to review quarterly reports. They'd work through weekends their kids had soccer games. And for what?
The happiest people understand that relationships are the ultimate investment. They schedule friend dates like business meetings. They call their siblings regularly. They know their neighbors' names and their barista's story.
Since leaving my corporate job, I've made relationships my priority. Every week, I reach out to someone I haven't talked to recently. Sometimes it's a text, sometimes a call, sometimes a handwritten note. The compound interest on these small gestures is extraordinary.
Happy people also know when to let relationships go. They don't waste energy on people who drain them. They invest wisely, in connections that offer mutual support and genuine affection.
5. They embrace routine without becoming rigid
This one surprised me. I always thought happy people were spontaneous, constantly seeking new adventures. But the consistently content people I know have solid routines that anchor their days.
They eat meals at regular times. They have bedtime rituals. They shop at the same farmers' market every Saturday. But here's the crucial part: they hold these routines lightly. When life throws a curveball, they adapt without drama.
My journaling practice perfectly captures this balance. I've filled 47 notebooks over the years, usually writing in the morning. But if I'm traveling or life gets hectic, I don't panic. I might write a few lines on a napkin or skip a day entirely. The routine serves me, not the other way around.
Structure creates freedom. When you don't have to decide everything from scratch each day, you have energy for what really matters. But flexibility keeps you from becoming brittle when life inevitably disrupts your plans.
6. They give without keeping score
The happiest people I know are ridiculously generous, but not in the way you might think. They're not writing huge checks or making grand gestures. They're generous with small things that cost nothing but mean everything.
They share their knowledge freely. They offer genuine compliments. They listen without checking their phones. They share vegetables from their gardens and books they've loved. At the farmers' market, I watch vendors slip extra produce into bags, not because they have to, but because generosity feels good.
What transformed my understanding of generosity was realizing it's not about the recipient. When you give without expecting anything back, you're affirming abundance. You're saying, "I have enough to share." That mindset shifts everything.
Start small. Send someone an article you think they'd enjoy. Leave a genuine comment on someone's post. Offer to water your neighbor's plants. These tiny acts of generosity create ripples you can't imagine.
The bottom line
At 70, I finally understood what I'd been missing all those years grinding away at spreadsheets, chasing success as society defined it. Happiness isn't something that happens to you. It's something you create through daily choices.
These six habits aren't revolutionary. You've probably heard versions of them before. But knowing and doing are different beasts entirely. The happiest people don't just understand these principles intellectually. They live them, imperfectly but consistently, day after day.
Start with one. Pick the habit that resonates most and practice it for a month. Notice what shifts. Then add another. You don't need to wait until you're 70 to figure this out. The happiest life isn't somewhere in the future. It's available right now, in the choices you make today.
