Real connection starts with simple, sincere words. Use these 10 openers to make strangers feel seen—and glad they met you.
There’s something quietly powerful about people who can make others feel instantly at ease.
They don’t dominate conversations. They don’t have to be witty or charming in the traditional sense.
Instead, they have a natural way of connecting—of making small talk feel warm, genuine, and real.
I’ll be honest: I used to hate small talk. It felt forced, shallow, even pointless. But over time—through years of running a business, meeting people from different countries, and marrying into a culture with its own rhythms of connection—I’ve come to see that small talk isn’t about “talking.”
It’s about bridging.
It’s the subtle art of saying something simple that opens up space for connection.
Below are 10 phrases that do exactly that. They’re easy, sincere, and proven to make people light up when you first meet them.
1. “How’s your day going so far?”
It’s such a small shift from the usual “How are you?”—but it changes everything.
When you ask someone how their day is going, you invite them into the present moment. It’s less about a generic “fine, thanks” and more about now.
It signals: I’m interested in you right now, not just being polite.
If you add something like, “Busy day?” or “Been a good one so far?”, it encourages them to open up without feeling pressured.
In psychology, this kind of question is called a “low-stakes opener”—it gives people freedom to share just as much as they want.
2. “That’s actually really interesting—tell me more about that.”
This one has a kind of magic.
It’s not just what you say, it’s how it feels.
It tells the other person that what they said matters enough for you to want to go deeper.
In conversations, people are subconsciously scanning for signals: Am I being heard? Do I matter?
When you respond with curiosity rather than comparison, you create emotional warmth. I’ve found that in new conversations—especially across cultures—this single phrase can transform the vibe instantly.
3. “I’m really glad we met.”
Simple. Genuine. Underrated.
It works beautifully near the end of a first conversation, when you’ve built even a small sense of connection.
In fact, studies in social psychology show that explicitly expressing appreciation strengthens the emotional memory of the interaction. People remember you not for your cleverness, but for how they felt around you.
When you say, “I’m really glad we met,” it sends a subtle message: You’re someone worth remembering.
4. “You’ve got great energy.”
Compliments can easily feel surface-level—but not this one.
It’s not about looks, status, or possessions. It’s about presence.
Telling someone they have “great energy” acknowledges something they bring into the space.
And the truth is, people rarely hear that kind of feedback. So when they do, it lands deeply.
Just make sure it’s genuine—say it when you actually feel it. Fake enthusiasm is easy to spot, and nothing kills warmth faster than inauthentic flattery.
5. “You seem like someone who really loves what they do.”
Even if you’ve only just met, paying attention and noticing passion in others is one of the best ways to connect.
It works especially well in professional settings, networking events, or even casual coffee meetups.
People want to be seen—not for what they have, but for what drives them.
I’ve used this line countless times after a short chat about someone’s work or hobby. Their eyes light up. They start sharing stories, and suddenly it’s no longer small talk—it’s real talk.
6. “That reminds me of something I experienced once...”
One of the most natural ways to build connection is through shared experience.
This phrase transitions the conversation from a Q&A dynamic (“you talk, I ask”) to a shared flow (“we talk”).
But here’s the key: don’t make your story longer than theirs. Match the tone and keep the rhythm of exchange alive.
People often assume connection is about listening. But it’s actually about balanced self-disclosure—the rhythm of give and take that makes both sides feel equal.
7. “You know, I really respect that.”
There’s power in showing respect—not just agreement.
You might use this when someone shares a strong opinion, or tells a story about something difficult they’ve done.
Respect acknowledges courage, effort, or authenticity. And those are all things we crave recognition for.
I remember a friend telling me about moving countries alone in her twenties. I didn’t say “That’s cool.” I said, “You know, I really respect that.” She smiled in a way that told me it mattered.
8. “You have a really calm (or funny, or thoughtful) way about you.”
People rarely get feedback about their vibe.
When you name it—and it’s true—they feel seen in a way that’s surprisingly intimate for such a simple phrase.
Try noticing someone’s tone, rhythm, or way of speaking. Then comment on it softly, without exaggeration.
Something like:
“You have a really thoughtful way of saying things.”
“You seem super grounded—has anyone told you that?”
That kind of observation makes people feel safe with you. It tells them you’re paying attention not just to their words, but to who they are.
9. “I like how you said that.”
It’s a small but elegant way to affirm someone’s expression.
Instead of complimenting the idea (“That’s smart”), you’re appreciating their articulation.
It’s especially useful when someone tells a story, uses humor, or phrases something uniquely.
This line does two things at once:
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It validates their creativity or intelligence.
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It subtly raises the quality of the conversation—because you’re signaling that words matter.
As someone who’s spent years writing for a living, I’ve noticed that people open up most when they feel their words land.
10. “It’s really nice talking with someone like you.”
A simple phrase that lingers.
It works as a closer to any warm, brief conversation—at an event, a cafe, a friend’s gathering.
It makes people feel chosen in a quiet way.
Like, out of all the small talk that could’ve been awkward or forgettable, this one felt easy.
That’s the art of small talk at its best—not impressing people, but helping them relax into being themselves.
A personal note
For most of my twenties, I thought connection came from being interesting.
When I’d meet people, I’d overthink what to say—trying to sound smart, funny, or confident. But the truth is, connection rarely happens that way.
It happens in the small, almost invisible moments: the way you listen, the way you pause, the way you respond with warmth instead of rushing to fill silence.
I still remember the first time I met my wife’s family in Vietnam. My Vietnamese was clumsy, my tone wrong half the time—but they smiled because they could feel my effort.
That’s the beauty of small talk—it’s not about perfect words. It’s about emotional presence.
And when you bring that presence into a first meeting, everything changes.
Final thoughts
In a world obsessed with networking, influence, and “personal branding,” it’s easy to forget that genuine connection starts small.
One phrase. One smile. One moment of shared attention.
The art of small talk isn’t about filling space—it’s about creating space where warmth can grow.
So next time you meet someone new, don’t try to be impressive. Try to be open.
Say something simple. Say it with curiosity. Say it like you mean it.
Because sometimes, the right small talk isn’t small at all.
It’s the start of something truly human.
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