10 phrases that will turn strangers into friends in less than five minutes

I was waiting in line at a food truck after a Saturday trail run, still pink-cheeked and happily sore, when the woman in front of me sighed at the menu like it was a riddle. “I never know what to pick,” she said to nobody. Normally, I would smile and look at my shoes.

Instead, I tried something I have been practicing. I pointed to the roasted cauliflower tacos and said, “I’m torn between these two. If you were ordering for both of us, which one would you choose and why?”

She laughed, picked the cauliflower, and five minutes later we were sitting on a curb, swapping life stories between bites. We still text about recipes.

Strangers do not magically become friends. They become friends because we offer them simple bridges. The right phrase, said with warmth and authentic interest, lowers the social drawbridge fast.

Here are ten short lines I use that consistently turn strangers into almost-friends in five minutes or less, plus why they work and how to make them sound like you.

1) “What’s the best part of your day so far?”

Why it works: “How are you” invites autopilot. “Best part” nudges the brain toward a specific memory with good feeling attached. Specific stories beat generic answers every time.

How to use it: Ask it with a small smile and open posture. If they say, “Honestly, this coffee,” follow up with “What do you like about it,” or “Where should I go next time I need a good cup.” If they say, “I finally fixed my bike,” you have an easy path to ask what was wrong and how they solved it.

Make it yours: Swap “day” for “week” or “morning” based on context. Keep your follow up short so they have room to talk.

2) “I’m new here. What do regulars know that first-timers don’t?”

Why it works: People love to share insider knowledge. This phrase hands them an easy role: friendly guide. It also signals humility. You are not trying to impress. You are inviting help.

How to use it: Great for cafés, gyms, markets, classes, or neighborhood events. Nod as they answer and try one suggestion immediately. “I’ll try the oat latte with cinnamon.” Instant rapport.

Make it yours: Replace “new here” with “new to this trail” or “first time at this event.” The key is asking for a tiny, low-stakes tip.

3) “Can I borrow your brain for 30 seconds?”

Why it works: It respects time and flatters lightly without being smarmy. It frames your ask as quick, which lowers resistance. Most people say yes before they know what the question is.

How to use it: Follow with a crisp choice or two. “I’m picking between these two salads. Which would you choose and why?” After they answer, share a detail back. “Good point on the dressing. I’m going with your pick.” That exchange creates a micro-win you share.

Make it yours: Swap “brain” for “taste” or “eye” depending on context. “Borrow your eye for 30 seconds on these frames?”

4) “What brought you here today?”

Why it works: It is open without being vague. “Here” can be a workshop, a party, a queue, a park bench. It invites a story rather than a label.

How to use it: If they answer with one word, add a gentle prompt. “Work” becomes “What kind of work pulls you to events like this?” “My sister” becomes “Fun. How did she rope you in?” Aim for playful curiosity, not interrogation.

Make it yours: If “what brought you” feels formal, try “What made you decide to come today?”

5) “I’m collecting recommendations. What’s one thing around here most people miss?”

Why it works: People enjoy feeling helpful and a little in the know. The word “collecting” makes it a game. “One thing” keeps the request light.

How to use it: Works with baristas, bookstore clerks, hotel staff, fellow travelers, even someone in line who looks like a local. When they answer, write it down in your phone with their name if you catch it. “Liam said to try the back patio at 4 p.m.” Later, tell them if you went. That simple loop turns a one-off chat into the start of a relationship.

Make it yours: Swap “around here” for “in this neighborhood” or “in this building” or “on this campus.”

6) “Mind if I join you for a minute?”

Why it works: Clear, respectful, and time-bounded. It solves the hardest part of moving from parallel strangers to shared space. You are asking, not assuming, and you are naming a brief window.

How to use it: Use where there is open seating, community tables, conference lounges, or post-class mingles. Sit, offer a simple reason. “I’m hiding from my inbox for five minutes.” Then toss a tiny prompt. “Have you been to this event before?”

Make it yours: If “join you” feels forward, try “Is this seat taken for the next few minutes?”

7) “What are you excited about right now, big or small?”

Why it works: Excitement is a fun door to walk through. Also, giving permission for “small” frees people from thinking they need a perfect answer. You will hear everything from “my basil plant finally sprouted” to “I signed up for a ceramics class.”

How to use it: After they answer, match their scale. If it is basil, stay with basil. Ask how they keep it alive. If it is ceramics, ask what they like making. Then share a tiny excitement of your own to keep it reciprocal.

Make it yours: Swap “excited” with “curious” if the setting is more reflective. “What are you curious about right now?”

8) “That looks great. What do you like about it?”

Why it works: It is a compliment that becomes a conversation. Instead of “nice shirt,” which dead ends, you ask for meaning. People tell you about a shop, a designer, a trip, a story.

How to use it: Keep your tone genuine. Avoid evaluating bodies. Focus on objects, choices, or outcomes. “That sketchbook looks well loved. What do you like about it?” Their answer can jump you to art, paper quality, or the practice that keeps them sketching. Now you are talking about a real part of their life.

Make it yours: If “looks great” feels too direct, try “I’m drawn to that. What do you like about it?”

9) “I’m Avery. Who do I get to meet?”

Why it works: Self-introduction plus playful framing. “Get to meet” is warmer than “what’s your name.” It sets the tone that meeting them is a small gift.

How to use it: Offer your name first and a handshake if appropriate. Repeat their name once in your reply so it sticks. “Nice to meet you, Tasha.” Then ask one easy follow up connected to the context. “How did you hear about this talk?”

Make it yours: Use your name, of course. If the room is formal, “I’m Avery, and you are?” still works. Keep “get to meet” handy for looser settings.

10) “I’ve got to run in a minute. Can we trade one recommendation before I go?”

Why it works: It creates a clear, kind exit while offering value. You are not ghosting. You are gifting. People remember the exchange and often follow up.

How to use it: Share first. “Mine is a short podcast episode that made me laugh on my commute.” Then ask for theirs. If it lands, suggest a light connection. “If I check yours out, can I tell you what I think next time?” Or “Want to swap links right now?”

Make it yours: Trade “recommendation” for “tip,” “song,” “book,” “walk,” “recipe,” or anything you genuinely collect.

Small moves that supercharge these phrases

Pair words with warmth. Eye contact, a small smile, and an open chest do half the work. Your body communicates safety before your sentence finishes.

Keep your question single-threaded. One clear question beats three stacked questions. Let them answer fully before adding another.

Use micro disclosure. Sprinkle a tiny detail about yourself to signal reciprocity. “I’m new to this gym,” or “I always overthink menus.” Mutuality builds trust fast.

Match energy and pace. If they are quiet, keep your volume soft. If they are animated, ride the wave. The goal is harmony, not performance.

Exit kindly. Not every conversation wants to stretch. A graceful close keeps the door open. “I loved chatting. I’m going to grab a seat, but I hope I run into you again.”

Follow up if you can. If you see them again, reference something they told you. “How’s the basil?” Memory is friendship fertilizer.

Real-world scripts you can steal today

At a café: “I’m new to this place. What do regulars know that first-timers don’t?”
At a bookstore: “I’m collecting recommendations. What is one book you wish more people would discover?”
At the gym: “Can I borrow your brain for 30 seconds? If you were new to this machine, how would you start?”
At a networking event: “What brought you here today?” followed by “What would make this hour worth it for you?”
On a plane: “What’s the best part of your trip so far?” then “Any small tips I should not miss when I land?”
On a walk with a neighbor: “What are you excited about in the neighborhood right now, big or small?”
In a class line: “Mind if I join you for a minute? I’m Avery. Who do I get to meet?”

A quick story to close the loop. A few months ago I was volunteering at the farmers’ market, labeling pints of strawberries. A guy hovering near the herbs looked like he wanted to ask a question but kept stepping back. I said, “Can I borrow your brain for 30 seconds? I’m trying to decide if these look like a whole week of pesto or two days of enthusiasm.”

He laughed and said he had no idea, then confessed he was actually trying to figure out basil versus mint. We traded “best part of the day” stories while the line moved.

Five minutes later he walked away with basil, mint, and my favorite iced tea recommendation. The next week he came back and asked how my long run went. We are not best friends. We are something better than strangers.

You do not need charisma. You need curiosity and a few phrases that help other people share themselves without effort. Most of us are one good question away from feeling seen. Offer that question and you will be surprised how quickly the world becomes friendlier.

Final thoughts

Turning strangers into friends is not a magic trick.

It is a small set of repeatable moves delivered with real warmth: ask about the best part of their day, invite insider tips, borrow their brain for 30 seconds, ask what brought them here, collect one recommendation, ask to join for a minute, name what excites them, compliment and ask for meaning, offer your name and the gift of meeting, and trade a recommendation on your way out.

Pair those phrases with attentive listening, tiny disclosures, and kind exits. Five minutes is plenty.

Try one line today and watch how quickly a room changes when you give people an easy way to be human with you.