Mel Robbins says people who change their lives fast usually adopt these 6 rules

Change can feel like a glacier—massive, intimidating, and painfully slow—until it isn’t.

In my coaching work and in my own messy experiments with self‑improvement, I’ve noticed a curious phenomenon: when people finally tip into real momentum, they often credit a handful of simple ideas that reshaped the way they show up every single day.

Mel Robbins has spent years distilling those ideas. In a recent episode of her podcast she unpacks six lessons she learned while taking her Let Them Theory tour on the road.

The titles may sound almost too straightforward, but each one rewires a common mental trap and turns it into fuel.

I’ve tried them on trails, in spreadsheets, and in my vegetable beds—and I can vouch for how quickly they make stale goals feel urgent again.

Below you’ll find the six rules, why they work, and a few real‑life tweaks I’ve adopted to keep them sticky.

1. What if you did it bigger

Have you ever set a goal that felt responsible rather than thrilling?

I once mapped out a “reasonable” 5 km training plan because a marathon looked scary on paper. The plan fizzled.

The marathon? I eventually signed up and finished because the thought of telling people I’d quit at mile five was more embarrassing than sore quads.

Robbins calls this stretch thinking: instead of asking Can I manage this? ask What would it look like if I made it epic?

That shift yanks you out of incremental mode and forces you to engineer bigger systems—support crews, deadlines, recovery rituals—that make the result almost inevitable.

As she puts it, “The best things in life come from doing the things you think you can’t.”

Try it today: Inflate one target. If you’re pitching a side hustle, imagine attracting ten paying clients instead of two. Suddenly social posts, outreach emails, and a pricing sheet feel mandatory, not optional.

2. Bring the fun

Discipline is overrated if your body associates growth with dread.

When Robbins realized her tour stops were becoming high‑pressure performances, she sprinkled in dance breaks, goofy rehearsal playlists, and glitter‑bombed confetti cannons (until the fire marshal intervened).

The result: lower cortisol, higher creativity, and an audience that felt the energy.

I see the same effect each spring when I organize a “garden draft” with friends. We swap seedlings like fantasy‑league picks—cherry tomatoes for jalapeños, basil for rainbow chard.

The trade‑day laughs help me stick to the season’s weeding schedule better than any productivity app.

Try it today: Pair a boring task with a micro‑reward—your favorite podcast only during house cleaning, or a latte after writing 300 words. Fun is not a detour; it’s dopamine that keeps the car running.

3. Start with the end

Formerly, when I built financial models for executives, we always began with the question What decision will this model help us make?

That future‑back mindset forced us to define success metrics before touching a formula.

Robbins uses the same logic on stage: she designs each segment backward from the moment the audience stands up with a concrete takeaway in mind.

Research supports the practice. Psychologist Dr. Gail Matthews found that “You are 42 percent more likely to achieve your goals if you write them down,” because articulating an outcome clarifies the path.

Try it today: Write a postcard from your “completed” future self. Date it six months out. Describe what a normal Tuesday looks like once the goal is done. Then reverse‑engineer the milestones that make that postcard believable.

4. Things will go wrong, and it will be OK

During the tour’s Chicago stop, a confetti cannon jammed seconds before the finale.

Instead of panicking, Robbins riffed on the mishap, turning it into the night’s biggest laugh.

The audience left buzzing—not because everything was perfect, but because they watched resilience in real time.

I keep a “failure budget” for similar reasons. When I launch a new project, I assign 20 percent of the timeline and cash to unforeseen hiccups.

That buffer transforms surprises from crises into line items.

Try it today: Before starting anything challenging, jot down three likely obstacles and a first‑aid response for each. Pre‑acceptance kills perfectionism’s grip.

5. Fear means it matters

Butterflies are not exit signs; they’re arrows pointing toward growth. Robbins learned this lesson after coaxing her daughter, Sawyer, onto the tour stage despite paralyzing nerves.

The advice she handed down is blunt: when your pulse spikes, it’s proof the stakes align with your values—go anyway.

I feel the same flutter at every trail‑race start line. Instead of interpreting it as danger, I now label it data: This finish line is important to you, so your body is gearing up to perform.

Try it today: List three current fears in one column and, across from each, write the underlying value (freedom, mastery, connection) it threatens. Reframe the anxiety as evidence you’re on the right trail.

6. Do it because you think you can’t

The final rule is a dare. Robbins argues that the very sentence I could never… marks the frontier of your potential.

When she booked a five‑city theater tour with zero prior experience, the gap between her comfort zone and the task forced her to develop skills at warp speed.

I felt a similar leap when I pitched my first magazine article after years of crunching numbers.

The editor’s yes arrived, and the panic that followed morphed into late‑night research sessions, interview cold calls, and, eventually, a byline that changed my career trajectory.

Try it today: Pick one “impossible” action—public speaking, coding a website, running a 10 k. Sign up, pay the fee, tell a friend. Commitments carve neurological trenches deeper than intentions alone.

Final thoughts

Fast transformation isn’t magic; it’s momentum compounded by tiny physics‑defying nudges.

Make the project bigger so you can’t ignore it. Inject fun so your brain keeps returning for another round.

Draw a clear finish line, budget for chaos, welcome fear, and step straight into what feels impossible.

One of my favorite gardening truisms says seeds germinate fastest in well‑turned soil. These six rules are the spade. Use them to break the surface this week, and watch how quickly fresh shoots appear.