Maintenance isn’t about money—it’s about mindfulness. And maybe that’s the most elegant beauty ritual of all.
Have you ever noticed how some women say, “I’m just getting my maintenance done,” when they’re actually referring to what most of us would call a luxury?
A full day at the spa? Maintenance.
Weekly facials? Maintenance.
Two-hour blowouts before brunch? Maintenance.
It’s fascinating how language shapes perception.
For some, self-care is a ritual of refinement—just another calendar appointment.
For others, it’s a rare treat saved for special occasions.
But at its core, these “maintenance” routines all speak to something deeper: the value we place on ourselves.
So, let’s unpack seven beauty rituals that often separate “maintenance” from “pampering”—and what that says about self-worth, privilege, and how we care for ourselves.
1) The professional blowout
Let’s start with the crown—our hair.
For many upper-class women, a professional blowout isn’t reserved for weddings or important events.
It’s a weekly, sometimes twice-weekly ritual.
It’s not indulgence—it’s necessity.
The logic is simple: smooth, glossy hair is part of their polished presentation, as expected as clean clothes.
For everyone else, a blowout feels like a little luxury.
The warm air, the scalp massage, the mirror reveal—it’s pampering.
But for those who see it as “maintenance,” it’s built into their identity and routine.
I used to wonder: how do they justify spending hundreds a month on hair styling?
But when you think about it, it’s not really about the hair—it’s about control.
A perfect blowout can give the illusion of order in an otherwise messy life.
Even if we can’t (or don’t want to) maintain a salon habit, the principle stands: what small ritual helps you feel put-together, grounded, and in charge of your world?
2) The standing facial appointment
A facial every six weeks—on the calendar like clockwork.
To many women in the upper echelons, it’s as normal as a dentist visit.
But for most of us, it’s something we save up for.
When we finally lie back under the soft towel wrap, letting someone exfoliate, steam, and massage our faces, it feels like pure indulgence.
There’s a psychological twist here, though. When “maintenance” becomes routine, it also becomes invisible.
It stops feeling like self-care and starts feeling like a chore.
That can lead to taking one’s own wellbeing for granted.
I think that’s one of the biggest lessons we can borrow: consistency matters more than extravagance.
Maybe we don’t have an aesthetician on speed dial—but washing our faces gently, wearing sunscreen daily, and giving ourselves five quiet minutes of skincare ritual each night?
That’s real maintenance.
3) Regular massages
Massages are another fascinating one.
For many working-class or middle-class women, a massage is the pinnacle of luxury—something for anniversaries or post-vacation recovery.
But in some upper-class circles, massages are preventative, not reactive.
They’re framed as part of physical upkeep—like stretching or chiropractic visits.
It’s not indulgence; it’s self-preservation.
When I was working as a financial analyst, I used to see executives slip out mid-afternoon for “appointments.”
It wasn’t until later I realized many of those were massage sessions, scheduled weekly.
The mindset was: why wait until you’re in pain to take care of your body?
I find that logic compelling. Most of us wait for burnout to do something kind for ourselves.
Maybe we’d feel more balanced if we didn’t treat comfort as a reward, but as maintenance for our wellbeing.
4) The personal trainer (or Pilates instructor)
Here’s one that really highlights the gap between perception and reality.
Having a personal trainer—or a Pilates instructor who knows your muscle imbalances by name—is often portrayed as a sign of serious dedication.
But for the upper class, it’s not about fitness ambition.
It’s about accountability and structure—outsourced discipline, if you will.
It’s fascinating to me as someone who loves trail running.
When I lace up and head out, it’s my therapy, my meditation, my joy.
But in some circles, working out is less about connection and more about optimization.
And yet, there’s something to admire here.
Having someone hold you accountable to your health is a privilege, yes, but it’s also a statement: My body deserves professional care.
If hiring help isn’t an option, you can still adopt the principle.
Book movement into your calendar like it’s a meeting. Take it seriously.
Maintenance, in this sense, is simply commitment—to strength, longevity, and self-respect.
5) The dermatologist-on-call
When was the last time you saw a dermatologist for something other than an emergency?
For upper-class women, it’s often routine: quarterly visits for skin checks, preventative treatments, and personalized prescriptions.
To them, it’s no different from changing the oil in a car—you do it before there’s a problem.
To the average woman, that level of skincare access feels like luxury territory.
Laser treatments, prescription retinoids, preventive Botox—it’s not necessity, it’s indulgence.
But there’s something to be said for proactive self-care.
Catching issues before they escalate, treating your skin as an organ rather than an accessory, and viewing health as an ongoing relationship with your body—that’s worth taking from the “maintenance” playbook.
You don’t need expensive treatments to apply the mindset.
Routine check-ups, good nutrition, and daily SPF go a long way.
And as someone who’s vegan and spends a lot of time outdoors, I’ve learned firsthand that prevention beats correction every time.
6) The “everything” manicure
The humble manicure might be the most telling example of all.
For some, it’s a simple DIY moment—paint, dry, done.
For others, it’s a whole system: gel polish, botanical hand-wrap, nourishing nail essence, hand spa, the works.
And it’s done every single week.
In that upper tier, manicures aren’t a treat—they’re part of the social uniform.
Hands are visible in meetings, at dinners, in photos.
Polished nails are a subtle signal of order, attention to detail, and leisure time.
But here’s what I’ve realized: the deeper meaning isn’t about polish at all. It’s about ritual.
The process of sitting still, letting someone care for you—or caring for yourself—can be deeply grounding.
Maybe you don’t get biweekly gel sets, but you can make your own hand ritual sacred.
File your nails while listening to your favorite podcast.
Moisturize your hands before bed.
Light a candle while you do it.
You might find that “pampering” becomes your own version of maintenance.
7) The silent retreat (or solo wellness weekend)
This last one might surprise you, but I’ve noticed it’s a growing “maintenance” trend among upper-class women: the solo wellness retreat.
A weekend away at a holistic spa or a yoga resort used to sound extravagant.
But for some, it’s just how they “recharge.”
They treat these getaways like car tune-ups—necessary, scheduled, and non-negotiable.
What fascinates me most isn’t the destination—it’s the discipline.
These women protect their rest like a business asset.
They don’t apologize for it, and they don’t wait until they’re falling apart to take a break.
That’s a lesson most of us could benefit from.
Rest isn’t indulgent; it’s essential.
Whether it’s a night alone at home with your phone off or a long walk in nature, creating boundaries around restoration is one of the most powerful self-care moves there is.
Final thoughts
At the end of the day, the difference between “maintenance” and “pampering” often comes down to mindset—and access.
Money, of course, plays a massive role. But there’s also something psychological happening beneath the surface.
When something is seen as maintenance, it’s woven into identity. It’s not questioned or delayed; it’s simply done.
When something is viewed as pampering, it’s framed as extra, optional, even a little guilty.
But what if we started flipping that script?
What if we treated self-care—whatever that looks like for us—as necessary upkeep for our bodies and minds, not a luxury we have to earn?
I’m not suggesting we all book weekly massages or facials (though if you can, lucky you).
But I do think we can all reclaim the word “maintenance” in our own way.
Drink your water. Move your body. Moisturize. Take breaks before you burn out.
Because maintenance isn’t about money—it’s about mindfulness.
And maybe that’s the most elegant beauty ritual of all.
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