10 phrases people with poor social skills often use without realizing how awkward they sound

I used to end conversations by saying "Well, I should let you go now."

I thought I was being polite, giving the other person an out. My partner finally told me it sounded like I was announcing I was bored and dismissing them.

That had never occurred to me. I was trying to be considerate, but the phrase communicated the opposite of what I intended.

People with poor social skills often use phrases that sound fine in their heads but land awkwardly in actual conversation. They're not trying to be rude or weird. They just haven't calibrated their language to how social interaction actually works.

Here are ten phrases that immediately signal social inexperience.

1) "Well, actually..."

Starting a correction with "well, actually" is the verbal equivalent of waving a flag that says "I prioritize being right over being likable."

Socially skilled people correct others rarely and gently when they do. "Well, actually" announces that a correction is coming and centers the speaker's knowledge over the relationship.

I used this constantly in my twenties. Someone would say something slightly inaccurate, and I'd jump in with "well, actually" followed by the correct information.

What I communicated wasn't helpfulness. It was that I cared more about factual accuracy than about letting the conversation flow naturally.

People with better social skills either let small inaccuracies go or find softer ways to add information without making it a correction.

2) "That reminds me of myself when..."

Redirecting someone's story back to yourself is a classic social skills mistake. They're sharing an experience, and you immediately make it about you.

This phrase signals that you're not actually listening, you're just waiting for your turn to talk about yourself. Even when you mean it as relating to their experience, it comes across as conversational hijacking.

Socially skilled people ask follow-up questions about the other person's story. They make the person feel heard before potentially sharing their own related experience, and only if it genuinely adds to the conversation.

3) "I'm not good with people"

Announcing your social deficits as a disclaimer might feel like managing expectations, but it actually creates awkwardness and makes people uncomfortable.

It puts the burden on the other person to accommodate you and signals that you're not working on improving. It's self-deprecating in a way that doesn't invite reassurance, it just makes the interaction tense.

Socially skilled people don't announce their weaknesses in casual conversation. They work on improving without making their struggles everyone else's problem to navigate.

I used to open interactions with some version of this, thinking it explained potential awkwardness. It just made things more awkward.

4) "To be honest..." or "I'll be honest with you..."

This phrase implies that everything you said before wasn't honest, which immediately makes people distrust you.

People with poor social skills use it as a filler phrase without thinking about the implication. They mean "I'm about to share my actual opinion" but it reads as "I've been dishonest up until this point."

Socially skilled people just share their opinions without announcing a shift to honesty. Their honesty is implied by the fact that they're speaking.

5) "No offense, but..."

Whatever comes after "no offense" is always offensive. This phrase is a warning that you're about to say something rude and want to preemptively defend against consequences.

People with poor social skills think this disclaimer somehow neutralizes the offense. It doesn't. It just announces that you know you're being rude and are doing it anyway.

Socially skilled people either don't say offensive things in casual conversation, or they say difficult things in ways that don't require disclaimers.

If you need to say "no offense," you probably shouldn't say what follows.

6) "Well, I should let you go now"

This was my signature move for years. I thought I was politely ending conversations by giving the other person an excuse to leave.

What I was actually doing was announcing I was done talking and framing it as consideration for them. It sounds dismissive, like you're bored and ready to move on.

Socially skilled people end conversations with phrases that include both people. "I should get going" or "I've got to run" or just naturally letting the conversation reach an endpoint without announcing you're ending it.

My partner pointed this out and I immediately recognized all the times I'd used it thinking I was being polite while probably making people feel dismissed.

7) "As I already mentioned..."

This phrase is pure condescension disguised as clarification. It signals impatience with the other person for not remembering or paying attention.

People with poor social skills use it when they have to repeat information, not realizing it makes the other person feel stupid rather than informed.

Socially skilled people just repeat the information neutrally without pointing out that it's a repetition. "The meeting is at three" rather than "As I already said, the meeting is at three."

8) "You probably don't care, but..."

Prefacing your thoughts with an assumption that others don't care is self-defeating and awkward. You're asking for reassurance while simultaneously putting down your own contribution.

If you really think they don't care, don't share it. If you want to share it, share it without the self-deprecating disclaimer.

People with poor social skills use this to manage potential rejection. They're defending against the possibility that others will dismiss what they're saying by dismissing it first.

Socially skilled people either share things confidently or gauge interest before launching into topics. They don't preemptively apologize for speaking.

9) "I know this is random, but..."

While this is less awkward than some phrases on this list, overusing "random" to transition between topics signals poor conversation flow management.

Occasional topic changes are fine and don't need announcement. Constantly saying "this is random" before changing subjects makes you sound like you don't understand how conversations naturally evolve.

Socially skilled people either find natural bridges between topics or let conversations shift organically without announcing the shift.

I still catch myself doing this sometimes, especially in professional contexts where I feel nervous about changing direction.

10) "Actually, I read that..."

Starting contributions with "actually" followed by a fact you've read signals that you relate to conversations primarily through information you've consumed rather than personal experience or genuine exchange.

It's not wrong to share things you've learned. But leading with "actually, I read that" makes you sound like you're constantly fact-checking the conversation rather than participating in it.

People with poor social skills often default to sharing facts because it feels safer than sharing opinions or experiences. They interact through information rather than through genuine connection.

Socially skilled people share information naturally without framing it as a correction or citation. "I heard that exercise helps with sleep" rather than "Actually, I read that exercise improves sleep quality."

Final thoughts

None of these phrases make you a bad person. They're just markers of social inexperience that create awkwardness without you realizing it.

I've used most of these at various points. Some I still catch myself using before stopping and rephrasing. They're habits built from not quite understanding how language works in social contexts.

The good news is that once you become aware of these patterns, you can start adjusting. Social skills aren't fixed personality traits. They're learnable behaviors that improve with attention and practice.

If you recognize yourself using several of these phrases, you're not broken or hopeless at social interaction. You've just developed language patterns that don't serve you well socially.

The first step is awareness. The second step is practicing alternatives. Instead of "well, actually," try "that's interesting, I'd also heard..." Instead of "I should let you go," try "I need to get going, but this was great."

Small adjustments in phrasing can significantly improve how your contributions land in conversations.

Most people with poor social skills aren't lacking intelligence or good intentions. They've just never learned the subtle calibration that makes social interaction smooth rather than awkward.

That calibration can be learned. It requires paying attention to how your words land rather than just focusing on what you want to say. It means sometimes choosing phrases that feel less precise but work better socially.

And it means accepting that social communication has different rules than written communication or internal monologue, and that those rules matter even when they seem arbitrary.

If you work on replacing these ten phrases with more socially calibrated alternatives, you'll notice conversations becoming easier and less awkward. Not because you've changed who you are, but because you've learned to express yourself in ways that others can receive more comfortably.